Blog5 Games

In the last twenty-odd years, this is how far we’ve come. The image on the left is from Nintendo’s Double Dribble (1987) and the Xbox 360’s NBA Live ‘06. While, most are no actual gameplay images and definitely do not reflect each game’s fun factor, they do give an idea of where we are graphic-wise. Man, when I was 9, the pre-renders in Double Dribble were the bee’s knees. Just think, twenty years from now, we’ll all be talking about the “retro look” of the Xbox 360, the PS3 and current PC games. Can’t wait.

Comparison Here [Fosfor Gadgets] Thanks, Mikael!

 
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Related: The Craziest Famicom Game Evar

I met Kornelia, the Queen of Quake, over at the S3 booth during GDC. She seems very nice, unless you’re playing her in a game of Quake, then she’s just the last thing you see before being fragged into humiliation.

Seriously, she was taking people out in seconds and she didn’t look like she was really even concentrating that much.

The S3 folks were giving away a graphics card to anyone who beat her ina match. One S3 guy told me that Kornelia wanted to make it two or three on one so it would be more challenging for her.

Having watched her play, I think the key to her success are her freaky long fingers. Those things are frightening. I was going to take a video of her hands during play, but I didn’t want anyone to get the wrong idea.

 
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This is very cool. The Maxtrox people sent me a press release about their TripleHead2Go gadget a few weeks ago.

The device plugs into your graphics card and then splits the signal three times so you can use three monitors. It fools Windows into thinking the three are just one really big monitor.

I happened upon their booth at the show and was really impressed with the device. They said they’ll be sending me a loaner so I can check it out. It looks as if there is no distortion and very little lag, depending on your card and monitors of course. The best part is you can actually mix and match the three monitors.

Very cool.

 
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Related: Poll: Should Nintendo Rename the Revolution?
Related: New Revolution Hardware Pics

In celebration of Shadow of the Colossus’ five GDCA awards, we present this stirring visual metaphor of Colossus owning the competition. Or… wait a second… vice versa, I guess.

Related: 6th Annual Game Developers Choice Awards WInners

 
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After leaving the Sony Party you have to get in another line and let them snip your little plastic security bracelet. In exchange, they give you this cool little Swiss+Tech tool with the Playstation logo on it.

 
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Related: Europe To Get Just As Many PS3s As Everyone Else: 0 * 0.33

Today, video game movie Stay Alive hits American movie theaters. It stars Frankie “Don’t Call Me Malcom” Muniz and follows a bunch of teens as they are killed in a video game or something. Can’t find a review of the film, but know most will include this zinger: “Stay Alive? More like Stay Away.” Cue the rim-shoot.

Watch The Opening [Kotaku] Thanks, Robert!

 
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Related: Stay Alive: Here’s the Opening Scene

I managed to capture a video of the second half of the Brain off during Iwata’s keynote at the GDC yesterday.

Basically, they called Will Wright, GDC Director Jamil Moledina and some G4 guy to the stage and had them take on the localization guy. It was a Brain whooping, though in the second game, Wright had an amazing come back.

Keep in mind none of these guys had ever played the game before.

 
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Iwata’s keynote at the Game Developers Conference yesterday was pretty amazing. It was interesting to hear him talk about the birth of Brain Games, NiWiFi and the Revolution Controller.

One of the cool images he popped up for half a second during the speech is this one showing all of the prototype controllers they made before deciding to go with the remote control variety. Pretty cool, huh?

 
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Related: Animal Crossing Getting Revolutionized
Related: More Revolution Pictures: What’s that thingie?

Earlier today, we showed you the endings to two of Link’s more execrable adventures: Wand of Gamelon and Faces of Evil on the Phillips CD-i. With a luscious pout and animation produced in the animation workshop of a south California Down’s Syndrome Community Center, Link was instantly transformed from noble hero of Hyrule to some fruity wizard’s gay boy toy with a penchant for surfer speak.

You laughed, you cried, you wanted more. Well, far be it for Kotaku to disappoint… that’s why we keep the bar here low. Now, we proudly presents the beginnings of Wand of Gamelon and Faces of Evil.

Faces of Evil is after the jump.

Hey, Zelda! How about a fuck? For luck!

Related: Two Horrible, Horrible Zelda Endings

 
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Related: Two Horrible, Horrible Zelda Endings
Related: Two New DS Brain Games
Related: Iwata’s GDC Keynote Transcribed

Seriously, how wrong is this?

 
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Related: Rock, Paper…Multiplayer!
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So this was a strange little item being shown off at GDC. The tiny, glowing treasure chest plugs into a USB slot and then your computer acts as security. Essentially, this just means you need to plug it into your computer to open it without the help of a screwdriver.

Kinda….um…useless?

 
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Related: External Hardware Runs Three Monitors as One
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Dear Sony, Thanks For The Delay, Love Steve

“Who cares who wins the Sony/Microsoft battle anymore. Pick the console which has the games you want to play, and stick to it. I just hope Sony doesn’t totally fail with the PS3, because everything needs a little competition to keep prices down to the consumer.”

by nesdude

Game Porn Stars Wanted

“I’m not sure if I should be aroused or absolutely frightened.”

by Draconis

Why Do You Play Old Games?

“I also play them because they are generally more challenging and more of an exercise in brain and reflex skill than newer games. Also, old games are typically just more fun because the developers concentrated on the game itself and not on graphics, fmvs, etc.”

by Apreche

Starforce Reboots Your PC Without Warning. Don’t Like It? You’re Mafioso

“I have another idea: how about not charging a freaking arm and a leg for the software to begin with? They want to get rid of piracy? How about getting rid of the purpose of piracy?”

by macdeth

Live Blogging PS3 Part 2

“I’m looking forward to all this talk of “new sources of revenue” coming to fruition. Isn’t this just another way of saying “gouge consumers” by getting them to buy a $60.00 game, then bombarding them with ads, and giving them a shell of a game that “fills out” the more “micro-payments” you make? Instead of in-game achievments unlocking things, you have to purchase them. Want that nice fancy car? 500 Sony Credits please. I know MS is already doing this, but this is just further confirmation of where the industry is going.”

by Fuzz

Shake-Up at Sony Online Entertainment

“I am tired of hearing the fall of SWG fall on ‘SOE not listening to the customers’. Individual players know what they want, which usually derives in some sort of benefit to their own player often at the cost of others. In other words, a shift in balance. Therefore, the collective term of ‘players’ as a whole do not know what they want because their views stretch in so many directions and lack that sense of balance.

I am by no means agreeing with the decisions made by SOE, but the fault does not lie in their ‘lack of attention’ to the fanbase. Perhaps it is their listening to the fans that have caused such drastic changes to the game, or rather to the fans that aren’t playing, which they are trying to attract. Fans lost to WoW or any other MMO. By listening to the public too much, they’ve lost sight of the original game and have decided to play ‘catch-up’.”

by vgachi

Itching to talk? Hit us up at tips@kotaku.com for an invite to join our merry band of commenters.

 
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I guess news of a Booth Babe crackdown at E3 has the oddly dressed woman contingent looking for other places to prance about. I’m not quite sure how this had anything to do with the booth, though at one point she was playing paddle ball.

 
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Related: Iwata’s GDC Keynote Transcribed
Related: More Revolution Pictures: What’s that thingie?
Related: Zelda Phantom Hourglass GDC Video

Heterosexuality firmly in check, I was one of those guys who actually really dug The Longest Journey. That I could play it without confirming all my girlfriend’s suspicions about the bloodthirsty misogynism of men was a plus: instead of doing what she normally did when I played games — make exasperated sighing noises and having loud discussions on the telephone with her mother about her being right that I wasn’t the marrying type — she actually played it with me. It was the perfect boyfriend/girlfriend game, if only because what self-respecting guy could figure out the early puzzle where you need to use a pair of pliers, an inflatable duck, a belt and a diaphragm to get a key out of a subway tunnel?

Anyway, we’ve been anxiously looking forward to Dreamfall, The Longest Journey’s upcoming sequel. So we were pleased to see this fresh lathering of new Dreamfall screenshots over on Worthplaying. The art design certainly looks as beautiful as the first. Let’s hope they got rid of the pallid, dead-eyed mutants in the cut scenes this time.

‘Dreamfall: The Longest Journey’ (Xbox/PC) - 29 New Screens [Worthplaying]

 
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Japanese comedian/poet/actor/writer/director/painter Beat Takeshi released an insane Famicom game back in 1986 called Takeshi no Chousenjou (”Takeshi’s Challenge”). How insane? The title tells players, “This game is made by a man who hates video games.” Takeshi no Chousenjou puts the player through hell like forcing the player to sing karaoke continuously, stare at a blank monitor, pilot a plane that can’t go up and hit the final boss 20,000 times. Brilliant or sadistic? See for yourself in this Takeshi no Chousenjou clip.

Office Kitano [Official Site]

 
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Related: Mario Bros. Cleared Without Collecting Coins
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We hope you guys are ready for a weekend playing Guild Wars: Factions, because in about four hours anyone who has either played it in the past or can manage to beg an invite off of a buddy is going to be able to get a sneak peak of the expansion during this weekend’s Factions event. Better yet, they’re not sticking you with some weakling toon this time… you’ll be able to jump right into the meat of the higher level content!

From the announcement:

• For the Factions Preview Event, your newly-created characters will begin at Level 20.
• You will start out with 20 skills and will then speak to an NPC to select a secondary profession.
• Selecting a secondary profession will gain you an additional 20 skills.
• Your guild must choose a faction—Luxon or Kurzick.
• You can play four higher-level missions—two story missions and two competitive missions—appropriate for your Level-20 characters.
• You will be able to experience 15 quest areas.

If you already have a retail copy of Guild Wars, simply download the client. Cheap? Impoverished? Miserable torrent monkey? Well, we’d like to take this opportunity to extend this post’s comment section for any simpering invite pleading that might need to be done. We’re sure some Guild War aficionados can help you out.

Factions Preview Event [GuildWars.com]

 
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Related: Vista Gamers, You Need 2GB
Related: Retro vs. Next Gen Comparison

As we come out swinging, it’s good to know there’s someone in our corner. This week Logitech, Volkwagen GTI, BBC America, Playstation, Hershey’s, Moviebeam, EchoStar and Shatner DVD Club kept us from throwing in the towel. Thanks.

Interested in advertising on Kotaku? Click here.

With all the console hullaballoo, we here at Kotaku got a little bit preoccupied, fantasizing about our bright next generation game purses that we’ll soon be sissily swinging at one another when arguing about the supremacy of one versus the other.

Unfortunately, that means that we didn’t report on the PC side of things very much. Sorry about that — you PC gamers are a proud and bumptious lot with little to no patience for Nintendo’s latest bobble-headed offerings. If you aren’t composing your next 1600×1200 graphical sig, replete with all your system’s 3DMark scores and the complete quotes of Douglas Adams translated in Tolkein Elvish, you’re in the bathroom with a hardware upgrade catalogue, praying fervently that your Mom doesn’t knock. We know how it is — we’ve been there ourselves.

So good news, PC Gamers! Looks like you’ve got a sexy new PC upgrade coming your way! Because the Inquirer is reporting that Windows Vista is going to require 2 gigs of RAM when it’s released early next year. Although 900 meg seems to be the bare minimum required even to use Word or Powerpoint, it looks right now like Halo 2 or any other Windows Vista game is going to double the amount required. Looks like it’s time to start peeling apart the soggy pages of your latest Crucial catalogue!

Vista gamers need 2GB plus of memory [Inquirer]

 
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Related: Retro vs. Next Gen Comparison

Learn where the Commanders are hiding out.

Check this out! Hinata is a playable character!